No More Perfect Marriages: Experience the Freedom of Being Real Together

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I wish I could say I’m sorry for wanting a baby more than I want him. But that wouldn’t help, because it would be a lie. I’m not sorry.” It felt like an unnecessary attempt to make the story more suspenseful and emotional than it is. But whatever reason Hoover had in using this narrative style AGAIN, it didn’t work for me. I found myself getting angry and feeling manipulated. But more on that later.

I read this over the course of one day and I had to force myself to put it down. When I wasn’t reading, I was thinking about these characters and how their marriage was going to play out. I don't plan on writing a small ass summary of what this book is about or a blurb. I can't, because nothing I can possibly write will do it justice. I also recommend going into this one blind. Let it hit you full force, you may be on the ground for the next couple of days - but I guarantee you, it's worth it. At least it is for me. The whole idea of basing your entire self-worth on your ability to conceive and being this obsessed with having a child is foreign to me. I don’t think it is my purpose in life to have a child. Quite frankly, I find that to be a disgusting statement. I understand that there are people who want children, and that infertility is a traumatic experience for some – which is why I said this book wasn’t written for me.I’m going to put the trigger and content warnings below this paragraph! But if you want to go into this book completely blind, like many of Colleen Hoover’s readers do, please do not read my review. Plus, honestly? If you don’t have any triggers, it probably is best to go into this book blind. I won’t post any spoilers about the events of this book, but the rest of my review will talk about what this book is centered around. We immediately understand that this is a woman who wants to have a child desperately but can’t and it’s slowly tearing her on the inside that she can’t and is barely holding on. Quinn’s POV benefited a lot from Hoover’s sparse but emotional prose which captured Quinn’s pain so well. This book was written for me. I’m convinced of it. My marriage is going through some shit right now. It’s better than it was a few months ago but it’s still work. The word “divorce” has even been thrown around. So, I felt this book to my core. And that ending? Ehhh. It wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t fleshed out either. It felt very rushed. They opened the box, they cried, and everything just smoothed itself out. However, it was worth mentioning that they apologized to each other and renewed their commitment. But overall, it felt, I don’t know, underwhelming and rushed after all that build up. SPOILERS AHEAD - from this book and other Colleen Hoover’s books because I can’t stand her writing and if you love her books DON’T read my review because we’re not going to see eye to eye and I’m okay with that!

This love that Graham and Quinn shared was messy, beautiful and absolutely filled to the damn brim with hope. Their story showed an ugly truth to life, that hope isn't always something to lean on, rather something to keep close. There were some aspects in this book that I will talk about in the next section, only because I'm making everything above that last section spoiler free. I did get emotional but I didn't cry and that was only because of Graham's character and his affection/words. Graham deserves someone better than Quinn and I stand by that. This book had potential but from the way the whole story was structured to the ungodly amount of tragedy heaped on the heroine, CoHo made it really hard for me to care for the characters and the story.This was kinda insufferable. Let me set something straight though—I GET why people liked this one, it just wasn't for me mainly because of the tropes. However, I can't deny that this is one of CoHo's better books, and for that, it does get a higher rating. I say this in every review for the books I've read of hers; Hoover's work is hit or miss for me but this one ultimately is middle grounded.

The most important thing that I took from this book was the line, "I'm learning how to wear my struggle as a badge and not be ashamed of it." I've struggled a lot with my mental health over the last four years, and the thing I've found helps the most is this. Recognizing my feelings, experiencing them, crying them out if I need to, and never being ashamed of them. Annnnnddddd that’s all I’m going to say plot wise, no spoilers. As per usual with a Coho book I think it’s best to go in blind (like I did) and see what unfolds. I do think this subject matter will be VERY difficult for some readers. But I think Hoover handled it all brilliantly. Unfortunately, the past and present storytelling ruined the momentum for me. I hated it. Just when the story starts to get really interesting, you get pulled into another scene from the past and it became so frustrating! It was like Ugly Love all over again! Graham gives a false reason as to why he did it, which he later on told Quinn the truth in his letter. His initial reason was "the whole time I had my eyes closed, I pretended it was you.”. What is this book about? Well, I hope you’re sitting down because it’s about to get real. This was a captivating yet messy story that will make every cell in your body explode. We know that in most fairy tales, once you have a ring on your finger, you’ll live happily ever after. In this story you’ll find out that in real life; it does not work like that. There is no definitive list of “dos or don’ts” or like any easy steps to achieve a happily ever after. If you want a happily ever after then it’s going to take some effort to keep the love burning in a world filled with countless things that can stifle it.

Discussions

I loved Quinn and Graham's story. It was far from perfect. It was about making mistakes and losing your way but it was also about commitment and choosing to fight for love. I'm grateful I took the time to read this one. Sometimes it's important to have a reminder to focus on the positive, instead of shining a light on the negative. I thought this story was chemical, it broke my heart in the best way and as much as I hurt - I didn't want it to end. I didn't want to leave Quinn and Graham. I wanted to see every detail of what their lives would turn out to be. If you’ve been married for any amount of time, you’ve probably had one or two disagreements that were literally about NOTHING. You ended up having a blow up that could rival most Jerry Springer shows all over the smallest thing. Disclaimer: I do not suffer from the same infertility issues that Quinn went through but I personally thought this was handled well by Hoover. As the book is told by Quinn, we get to experience her pain and bitterness first hand. And a lot of the scenarios that she mentioned rang very true.